I shot my eye out...both sides of the story

The following is an account of an eye injury I suffered in New Hampshire. The first account was written by my girlfriend in first person, and the second one was written by me with dramatic hyperbole added.

Account 1

I had the opportunity to enjoy a wonderful Christmas in the North Country this year. Unfortunately, an inner corneal abrasion/erosion put a damper on things for Christmas Eve day. I was out of commission and required medical care. Thankfully, by Christmas Day eve, I was almost back to normal. I had a great time with everyone, amazing food, and a fabulous trip. I'll miss it up here.

Account 2

You should have seen me. Laughing, making others laugh, making friends all over the place, it was well on its way to being the best Christmas ever. Since the time I arrived in New Hampshire and put in my contacts, I thought my vision was a bit blurry. Waking up Christmas Eve morning, I had a sharp pain in my eye, and I knew it was a cornea abrasion. I begged, I pleaded for Victoria's kind uncle Walter to take me to an eye doctor. After calling around, she found one in a nearby town that agreed to see me. After arriving back at the house, I felt so bad for what I had done, for I knew that my injury was grave. So grave in fact, that I knew I had ruined Christmas for everyone in the state of New Hampshire. Santa Claus kicked in the door and took away all the presents from all the boys and girls in the state, including the presents of orphans. People were coming up to me and asking "why would you do this to us?" I banished myself to a clock tower where I would toll the bell on the hour. There, as I ate my Christmas Lasagna, I wept over the pain I had caused and the loneliness on earth I felt at that moment. I was determined to spend Christmas morning with everyone in the main house, so I healed up as fast as I could. I managed to make it through Christmas morning and had Christmas Turkey with everyone thanks to long periods of rest and loving prayers. To paraphrase Hamlet, "Angles and minsters of grace defend me"