Did this shirt fade

In another of my every popular I am a mall retard stories, I went to the mall today to kill some time before I had my house group meeting (see above). I had worn my new green shirt I had bought this past weekend, but I had sent it through the wash and I was convinced the shirt had faded after the one wash. I couldn't get this thought out of my mind and I'd look at it with a tad bit of "buyer's remorse" thinking the shirt had already lost some of its color. I went to the display where the shirt was located and held it up the identical shirt I was wearing. I compared the two shirts carefully and finally concluded that the shirt hadn't faded and it was simply that color. I also concluded the shirt was one of those shirts that was a slave to the light present. I couldn't get away, however, without a woman with her daughter walking by and seeing what I was doing and having her say "I think you've already got that one!!!" (yuk yuks all around).

Standing there, I quickly realized I was wearing practically the identical outfit the mannequin was wearing, so I snapped a picture of the mannequin with my camera phone. I'd take a picture of me too, but take my advice, I look just like this except with my head as opposed to being headless. Also, please ignore the portion of the mannequin peck in the bottom left hand corner of the picture.

Confusing store names (subtitle: I am a mall retard)

Ok, so, it turns out that stores in the mall think it is funny when they have more than one store in the mall for different ages. Some are better at it than others, such as "Baby Gap, and Ladies Foot Locker, and New Navy (Old Navy for Kids, it doesn't exist, but it should)...while others are designed to confuse people like me, as I am the equivalent of a father of a teenage girl in the mall. I can't remember if I blogged about the time I couldn't find my way out of Hollister because I couldn't figure out how to leave the store (you can just walk out, you have to walk out and turn). This story involves Abercrombie & Fitch. So, I walk into a store in the mall labeled "abercrombie" all lower case letters. It has the typical absence of color and the bass beat track, and I know I'm in the "right" place. I start looking around and the first thing I noticed is that I couldn't tell the difference between the men's and women's section. After I asked which side was which (yes I did), I started looking around....all the while the girl working there that I just asked the question to was eyeing me up and down. Now at first this did something for my ego as just prior to this some random high school girls took a random picture of me with them in JCPenny's and I asked them to make sure to tag me in Facebook when they put it up. I asked them how old they thought I was and they said they thought I was 21...sweet! Fresh off of this news, I was feeling pretty young and fly and the fact this girl who could not have been out of her teens was eyeing me up and down was making me feel pretty good. Upon closer inspection, however, I realized it wasn't a checking out eye I was getting, but more of a OMG what are you doing you freak eye (I should have picked up on this sooner as I have received this eye far more times than anyone checking me out). I was still struggling to find any clothes that I thought would fit me, as it all seemed to be for really thin people and I was starting to develop a complex about my body. I went back over to the girl that was giving me "the eye" and I asked her why it seemed that everything in the store was made for midgets. She had to explain to me that I wanted to go to the Abercrombie down aways and this was the Abercrombie for kids. I quickly deduced the reason she was giving me the eye she was giving me was she figured I was a looking to abduct a small child or something since I wasn't with anyone and I wasn't old enough to have a child to buy for in Abercrombie for kids. I had to sulk my way out of the store and go to the big people's Abercrombie, but by this time, my spirits were pretty shot. I ended up seeing one of the students that go to my school at the abercrombie...awkward!!!!!!