Post MCAT

Since the end of my summer semester, I have spent the vast majority of my time preparing for the MCAT.  I took it a week ago, and I should have my results in about three weeks.  In hindsight, I found it to be a fairly difficult test to prepare for because it was very much driven by passages.  I am currently working on my medical school application, and I am very much looking forward to applying and getting into school.  In the meantime, I'll be looking for a job so I can earn some money while I wait.

Jury duty

Many of us know the feeling...we open the very official looking envelope, read through the letter, and find out we have to report for jury duty.  We look at the date, then look at our calendars, and ask ourselves what are we going to miss out on in our lives.  I didn't know what to expect, but I found the experience to be interesting, boring, and OK all at the same time.

Without going into the case in too much detail, it was a civil case concerning an injury sustained while on a golf course.  The plaintiff's attorney found it necessary to ask all 30 some jurors in the pool the same seven to eight questions, which did get a bit repetitive.  When they got to me (I was third from last), they asked me what I did, including my occupation.  I said I was a full time student.  When the judge asked me if it was going to cause me to miss anything I needed to be present for at school, I told him that based on my last chemistry test, I should defiantly not miss more than I had to, which caused the judge to guffaw.  I believe the plaintiff's attorneys really lost interest in me when I answered some questions regarding my views on some aspects of the civil law process.

It was very interested to hear everyone in the jury pool tell their story, and it was interesting to think about how you were a part of the justice process.  It also gave me a glimpse that being an attorney probably wouldn't be a good fit for me.

On another note, check out the fly buttons they gave us to where!

Marathon

On October 3, I ran my first marathon.  My time was  4:38:58 and I came in 490 place out of 792.  A lot goes into running a marathon from a spiritual, mental, and physical point of view, so in thinking about how to write about the experience for this blog, I decided to write it from the point of different parts of me.

My Brain:

Was there ever a doubt I could do it?  Yes.  After all, a year ago this time, I had tried and failed to run a full marathon, only able to finish half of it (grant it, it was due to the Swine Flu).  Even standing in the parking lot waiting for the race to start, I told the rest of Dan that maybe he should get in his car and not go through with it.  I think it was just nerves.  As the sun rose, I started gaining more confidence that I could will the rest of Dan through the race.  After all, this is Dan's brain we're talking about.  There haven't been many problems I haven't been able to will Dan through.  Let's not forget how intelligent and witty I am after all.  As the race continued, I'm pretty sure I was the only thing that made the rest of Dan move forward.  After all, without me sending commands, he doesn't move at all.  I had to hum the theme to Rocky a few times, but I kept him going.  Yep, it was all me.

My Heart/Spirit:

Not only did I keep the blood pumping through Dan's body, delivering oxygen to his muscles, but I also was something more....something deeper.  I was the courage Dan didn't know he had.  I was the one who always believe he could do it.  I was the one that almost started balling after it was over, so happy and so proud for what Dan had just done.  Yes I did pray during the race.  I prayed that Dan would find all he was looking for out of this accomplishment.  Such a metaphor for life itself, but Dan fought the good fight...he ran the good race.

My Body (especially my legs):

WTF DAN!!!!



On a more serious side, thank you for everyone who believed in me that I could do this.  I could feel the power of your prayers.  I love you all.

Click here for my official race photos

You will have a opportunity to order your very own photo CD of my accomplishment!

Why we look backwards

I had a thought I thought I would share regarding why well tend to look backwards instead of forwards in our lives. Think it has a loot to do with patience. We often do not have the patience to wait for our future and instead we retreat to our past, assuming we have already had our best time, best moments, and best loves. I wonder what would happen if we took a leap of faith in God that we have our best days still in front of us. For a believing Christian, it is contrary to the faith to believe anything else, for if you were told you had two weeks to live and your death was to be filled with suffering, you have the promise of eternal life waiting for you; your best days are still ahead. Even when speaking in the context of this life, why do we not have the patience to think of those things yet to come and take the leap of faith that there is still much joy and happiness ahead of us? It may be our unwillingness to do this that prevents of finding our blessed futures. Yes, I'm thinking about these things because I'm currently going through life changes which are full of uncertainty and will require patience, but I hope to have my eyes towards the road ahead of me and not the road behind. This is my prayer.

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The end of an era

This post is one I've been thinking about for a few days.  When you have something this major in life occur, you want to think about its wording and what it means to express it.  I have reached the end of an era in my life, and I'm hoping to start a new chapter that will hopefully lead me to the path God has called me to.  I have resigned my position at the school as the IT director and will be a full time IT student.

The bible says a man can not serve two masters, and I know that was the road I was attempting to walk as I completed my first half of my pre-med coursework. Up until this upcoming fall semester, I have been able to get along by taking a night classes.  This summer, I used my vacation days to go to class during the daytime.  Looking at my schedule options for this semester, the classes I needed were only offered in the day.  In the final analysis, I believe that medicine is part of my future, so I must make my commitment in that direction.  Is it risky...yes.  It is a step I've been praying about since I received my calling as I knew this day would someday come.  Here is to the hope and belief that I am on the path God has set before me.

I will still consult the school when I can.  I have nothing but love and a positive view of the district and what I was able to accomplish while I was there.  I have made several great friends, and I wish everyone the best and a great year.  Now, I'm ready to move on to the next chapter in this adventure called life.  I would ask for everyone's prayers and I undertake this journey.

So now what

Do you ever hit a crossroads?  You feel like one door has closed behind you and you don't know what the next door to open up will be?  That is where I feel like I am today.  I'm very emotionally drained because of what I've gone through recently.  I've cried a lot, I've prayed a lot, I've thought a lot.  I've learned that I'm a very alive person on the inside because I can feel.  I've learned that my whole path God has laid out in front of me has not been revealed to me.  I've learned that I can love.  So now what for me?  What will my next pre-med class be like?  Who will I meet?  Who will I love?  Where will I go?

The blatantly unseen

With the arrogance we show

In the face of the blatantly unseen

Yet we walk out the door alone

With a sense of predictability

A day was such as this

A day of special occasion

The blatant was in full view

What is a mortal man to do?

From times past I know

A power greater than me was needed.

I went to my hometown to a place

Where I have never been before

The raindrops fell upon my head

As the circles radiated from the lake

Sitting by a spillway a waterfall flows

And that is what I hear

God's voice is like that you know

The drops my be falling harder 

But the voice can be heard

What are you going to focus on?

The neighbor Jesus loves, the widow

My next door neighbor lost his wife at the beginning of the year.  In warm weather months, I would see both of them outside sitting on their back porch, and I would often come over and say hi.  What makes me a bad neighbor is I didn't find out that she had passed until a month and a half after it happened (I found out from another neighbor).  What makes me a worse neighbor is I didn't talk to him for about another month.  I don't know what it was.  I know I have been busy with school and my life in general, but I also know I was putting it off.  I didn't know what I was going to say.  Tonight, I was feeling a bit down and I decided to get out of the house for awhile.  I saw his front door was open and I decided I walk up and knock.  I asked him how he was doing and he said he was ok and noted what a surprise and shock it was.  The conversation was a bit awkward until we started talking about what neighbors talk about best; we started to complain about another neighbor and how their dog that won't shut up.

Awhile back, my pastor had a sermon entitled "The Neighbor Jesus Loves, the Widow".  The verse cited was Luke 7:11-17, which reads:

11Soon afterward, Jesus went to a town called Nain, and his disciples and a large crowd went along with him. 12As he approached the town gate, a dead person was being carried out—the only son of his mother, and she was a widow. And a large crowd from the town was with her. 13When the Lord saw her, his heart went out to her and he said, "Don't cry."
14Then he went up and touched the coffin, and those carrying it stood still. He said, "Young man, I say to you, get up!" 15The dead man sat up and began to talk, and Jesus gave him back to his mother.

16They were all filled with awe and praised God. "A great prophet has appeared among us," they said. "God has come to help his people." 17This news about Jesus spread throughout Judea[a] and the surrounding country.

Busy busy

Taking a look at my last blog post, I know its been awhile.  Here's what's going on in my life right now...

I've started working on my new semester of pre-med courses.  I'm currently enrolled in Bio 1821 and I love it so far.  I am finding the biochemical processes to be fascinating.  I have what I think will be a good lab group and the discussion in class is very interactive.

I went pants shopping today and it turns out that, like in jeans, there exist no pants that fit me in nature.  I guess America has become too fat for pants companies to waste time making pants for the in shape few.  I think it would be easier if I became a nudist or a cross dresser (for what its worth, its not hard to have the body to become a nudist because, sadly, most nudist are unattractive).

Things in the social life are going well :)

Work is heavily involved in working on state and federal reports relating to testing and funding.  I'm feeling very on top on trouble requests.

Spiritual life is good.  I'm finding my prayer life has been pretty high in 2010.  I like a lot of things my church is addressing this year regarding the church's direction.  I've also been thinking about the quality of Christian work that is currently being put out; I hope to write a blog post about this later.

The sun finally came out in St. Louis.

My really awesome friends in Arizona are about to become parents.  They are going to be great!

Cable guy is coming Tuesday to switch over my services.

My fitness routine is really picking up speed.  I am starting to tell a difference in my muscle distribution.

I grew the most serious beard of my life this month.  I receive a lot of compliments on it.  It made me look quite a bit older and there was a little bit too much salt mixed in with the pepper for my taste.  In part, it was a cover to allow me to gracefully regrow my sideburns that were lost in a tragic trimming accident.

More later :)

Giving up cable, Part I

The new year tends to be a time where we look at our lives and ask ourselves how we can simplify.  Because I tend to be away from my house during the evenings and I have completely fallen out of love with TV because, lets face it, its mostly crap.  When I am home, I am a huge fan of being online, and I have found that while DVRs are nice, they pale in comparison to watching your favorite show on DVD.  I am therefore leaving AT&T and going back to Charter for the purpose of only having an internet connection (they are giving me basic cable for free).  I am going to be able to have a nicer internet connection, which I use, and if I find myself wanting to watch shows, I will have money left over to rent Netflix movies.  Now my friend Jonathan won't be the only person I know without access to HD tv.  I actually find TV in the traditional methods to be quite passé; there are just so many other options to receive entertainment content.  What are your thoughts?  Could you live without cable?  The switchover happens on Jan 14.  I'll write part II after the switch happens.

The day that was my birthday

I have to admit, I've had a case of the birthday blues today. It is a combination of it being the big 3-Oh!, being tired, and having a chance to reflect on my life. Not long ago, I showed Victoria the video of my first birthday. In looking at it, I had a chance to see a lot of family members that are no longer with us. In watching it (and in watching my brothers). its funny to see how my personality was starting to emerge even at that early age. I was very interested in the people around me and the conversations they were having. Instead of eating my cake, you saw me looking and pointing at my surroundings. This is very much like I am today. I love being involved with people. If you watch my brother, he is pretty much interested in eating his cake.

Many of the staff at work wised me a happy birthday, and Victoria made this a wonderful birthday weekend. Yet, I found myself kind of moping around work, again because I was tired and because I was not thrilled about my odometer rolling over as it were. Along with the staff wishing me a happy birthday, they were also talking about a former student at our school who was killed in an auto accident this weekend. I believe he was only 27. In listening to this, I felt down right ashamed for basically complaining about being alive for one more day. After I left work, I gave myself a swift kick in the butt and I decided to embrace the day. My mom and dad called me and wished me a happy birthday (my mom did at 4:10, the time I was born), and I had a chance to talk to Victoria as well. All in all, I'm very happy to be alive. In the spirit of being older however, I was showing some kids this morning how I could jump. I went to jump up and touch the rim in the gym and I think I pulled something in my back.

Biology Test

For those who read this blog and believe in the power of prayer as I do, I have my first Biology test tomorrow. I have been preparing for it all weekend, and I feel like I have a decent grasp on the concepts of the book, but the amount of information is so vast and complex, I have no idea how I'm going to do. If you would, please say a prayer for me.

Who was called to do what?

Have you ever read the bible? If you have, one thing you may notice is that God chooses a lot of people to serve him, and many of them are very unlikely choices by man's standards. Abraham was to be the father of a nation, but he was older than dirt and kidless. David was chosen to be a great warrior and a king, yet he wasn't tall enough to drive his own bumper car (probably did qualify to ride, I never understood that double standard). Saul of Tarsus was a hater, and basically became the ultimate advocate of Christians in teaching and writing with a blinding light and a name refresh. Even Jesus, the King of Kings, spent most of his youth hanging out in the carpenter shop.

I often wonder how many of us have felt a calling from God. If we have, do we answer it? We live in the age of caller ID, so it becomes too easy to screen the calls (even from God). As I have been eluding to, I'm hearing the call from God, and I'm intending to answer it. If one is willing to answer, its amazing who God will send your way to assist. I felt this tonight, as someone may have entered my life to change it forever. Don't you love self-censorship? Stayed tuned :)

What to write about

I kind of f9ind myelf in that position where a blogger never wants to find himself: self-censorship. I have a lolt of things swriling in miy mind right now, bot for whatever reason, I don't feel comfortable putting them ou there. Part of this is due to timing of events, and part of it involves other people, and I try to be sensitive to mentioning other people on my blog w/o their consent.

I can tell you that I am going to Houston in about two weeks, and then I will be going to AZ about a week after that. I'm getting into The Smashing Pumpkins in a big way right now, which is about right considering they are about 10 years past their prime, but I am in love with their bass player. My brother is wanting me to do another post comparing my life to The Karate Kid, so I'm pondering how to word that. I have been asked to be on my first "leadership team" at church for one of the things my church does, and I'm very happy to serve. I'm rebuilding the school's website, and I'm very proud of it so far (its at harmony175.org if you would like to see.) I'm going to have to get serious about my training if I don't want to die for my first marathon. I'm hoping that I will feel more comfortable moving forward talking about some of the deeper things on my mind. I also hope I come up with some funny material; I know my serious stuff doesn't read as well.

Prayer request

To all that read this and believe:

Could you pray for me? I have something in my mind that would be a major life change. If you see me or write me, I"d be more than happy to talk about it with you, but I don't feel comfortable blogging about it yet.

Dying 9-Year-Old Girl 'Weds' Friend

I don't usually post serious things on this blog, but this story really touched my heart. I don't have kids myself, but I do have two very sweet nieces, and when I see something like this, I think about them and how I pray they are always healthy and never sick. I was also in the play "Our Town" when I was in college, and that play is a lot about universal rites of passages and feelings we all experience regardless of the time period we live. I hope I'm fortunate to see my nieces, and my own future children, grow up to see their wedding day.

http://news.aol.com/health/article/jayla-cooper-wedding/356245

Invigorated

I feel more alive today than I have in a long time. I'm guessing it has something to do with the fact I'm eating again. I'm thinking a lot about last night and how much fun it is to get out and socialize with people. I want to thank Liz so much for hosting!

Patience

I find myself stewing this morning and in quite a bad mood. I didn't sleep well (again), and perhaps my body is playing tricks on me because my diet has been a bit unusual of late. I am in my office right now, I have my phone set to DND, and I would be quite happy if I didn't talk to another human being for the rest of the day. I'm getting somewhat frustrated that people find the best way to bring their tech issues to me is by stopping me in the hall while I'm working on something else since I have attempted to establish other communication channels for these issues to be communicated.

Saying all of that, I think the reason I'm stewing has to do with something much deeper than this. I wouldn't even be surprised if it has a lot to do with my lack of sleep. I can't say that I'm currently happy with some of the circumstances I find myself in with life at the moment. I would like to see a lot more happening in certain areas, and they either seem to be stuck in neutral or moving very slowly. I am really struggling with having enough patience to deal with the pace that I find myself in with life, and how I so wish I were further along. I wonder if it is to the point that I am actually on my way to other things, but I'm not even enjoying the trip there. If I am, I can't say that whatever trip this may be is overly enjoyable.

Sunday Night :(

Well, here it is, Sunday night. Sunday night is always the saddest time of the week for me. The reason has nothing to do with going back to work on Monday; I really like my job and there are many times were I would rather be there than at home. Sunday night is when I feel the most alone. Living by myself, I have a lot of free time. Sunday seems to be the time that is most quiet, and the time when I have the most time to think. I am as guilty as anyone else I suppose of thinking of the things I don't have and the things I want as opposed to the things I'm blessed with. I would think that this time would be one of the most special times to spend with someone special as you prepare for your new week and talk about what you would like to get accomplished.